Sometimes, coming face to face with ourselves can feel uncomfortable, but I don’t believe this encounter necessarily has to happen while walking or taking a break along a long-distance mountain trail. It could happen while queuing at the supermarket, an undertaking every bit as challenging as climbing a mountain – especially when the parking meter has already expired and a police officer is leaning over our car. Or when we know that the last tram is the very one that will stop and then pull away before our eyes while we are still stuck in line. The moments when we come face to face with our own cumbersome selves are those in which we are forced to reckon with who we are: with our fatigue as we carry our backpack, or with the awareness that time is running out to fill the fridge or prepare dinner. They are the moments when we cross a ridge, more exposed to danger, where every step has to be carefully measured.
But what is the measure? Perhaps this is where a subtle difference emerges between standing in a queue and walking a long-distance mountain trail. I am the one who measures the length of my steps: I am the one who knows how far I can walk. In a queue, I cannot predict whether the person in front of me, standing between me and the checkout, will be quick or slow to put their shopping on the conveyor belt; whether the cashier will be efficient or not; or whether an item might even be missing its barcode, causing an unbearable delay for someone whose time is dictated by others. By the tram driver, for example.
Yet on a long-distance mountain trail, there are just as many factors that are beyond our control, but that we can understand and measure. The length of each individual stage, for example; the elevation gain from point A to point B; whether or not there is water along the route; even how exposed the trail is to the sun or the weather forecast for the day. How long will it take me, carrying a heavy backpack and with two days of hiking already behind me, to climb 1,000 metres of elevation gain? Will I make it to the next mountain hut before 2 p.m., when rain is forecast? All these things need to be measured. But the outcome depends on us: we are the ones who, with an honest awareness of our own abilities, can know the answer.